Corvette Clover!

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Well, it was a Cloverina (female Clover). But, nonetheless – an exemplar of the species.Cloverina 1

Here’s the story:

I was coming home from Lowes in my little pick-up truck, an ’02 Nissan Frontier with the four-cylinder engine. Not a hot rod by any stretch of the imagination – especially with the bed loaded down with bags of cement and cinder blocks. The road – US 221 – is a lightly traveled highway that bisects rural Floyd County, Va. where I live. The speed limit is 55 – with most traffic moving about 5-10 MPH faster than that.

Just to set the stage.

I’m trundling home in the truck, not even “speeding”  – due to the load. I’m doing about 55, maybe getting up to 60 on the downhills. Up ahead, there’s a white minivan obviously traveling well below the speed limit as I am rapidly overtaking. But – surprise – it’s not the minivan that’s clogging the road. It’s a late-model Corvette convertible.

With Cloverina behind the wheel.

The minivan is stuck behind the ‘Vette – and I’m stuck behind the van. Cloverina is holding unsteady, undulating her speed between 40 and 47 MPH, back-and-forthing (as Clovers and Cloverinas tend to do) for no discernible reason. This is random slowing down and speeding up is almost as aggravating as being stuck behind a slowpoke who (cue Kyle Reese voice from the first Terminator movie) absolutely will not pull off – ever - to let the cars behind get by.

There appeared to be nothing wrong with the Corvette; the problem was the Clover behind the wheel.Cloverina 2

Just ahead, a passing zone – a nice long straightwaway. When we get there, I pass both the minivan (which showed no inclination to pass the ‘Vette) and the Cloverina in her Corvette. My speed rose – briefly – to about 70 and then I eased back into the right lane and continued on my way. A glance in the reaview showed the Corvette receding quickly – with the minivan driver now riding the Corvette’s ass.

I rounded a corner – and the van and ‘Vette disappeared from my line of sight. I continued on toward home, about three miles down the road.

There is another long straight section with a marked/legal passing zone just before you get to the turn off for our road. I glance in the rearview – and notice Cloverina’s Corvette is closing on me at an extremely rapid pace. She had to be doing at least 80-something – statutory “reckless” driving in my state. In moments she was riding my ass. So close the Corvette’s always-on parking lights (Daytime Running Lamps) dropped from my view.

Mind, we’re on a straight stretch. A marked – legal – passing zone. No oncoming traffic. She’s got a Corvette with 400-plus hp under the hood. But instead of passing me, Cloverina is sucking on my tailpipe.

I brake-checked the dumb bitch.

Good thing – for her – that Corvettes have good brakes.

She just barely avoided a cold bumper sammitch and (hopefully) spilled hot coffee all over her coochie. Sterilizing this creature would have been a service to humanity.

My truck, though small, has an exposed metal bumper connected to a heavy steel frame. It would have done quite the tune-up on the plastic/fiberglass front clip of her no-doubt sugar daddy-bought Corvette.

She backed off. But didn’t – wouldn’t – pass.Cloverina 3

What is wrong with these people? What, as R. L. Ermey might put it, is their major malfunction?

I conjecture Cloverina was on her sail fawn when I (and the hapless van) encountered her. Being a Cloverina, her call took precedence over paying attention to her driving – much less giving a damn about the other drivers she was holding up.

But she – like many Clovers I’ve dealt with – cares very much when one of those drivers dares to pass.

This, to a Clover, is an affront to what they consider to be their turf . . . so to speak. It fires the lizard brain. The only brain Clovers posses.

Must teach lesson!

So, Clover (or Cloverina) speeds up to thwart the pass. Or – if the passer is successful – Clover will often do as my Cloverina did and rocket up to Ludicrous Speed in order to catch up to the passer and will then ride his bumper like a lamprey on a shark.

They’ll drive as recklessly in reality as they accuse us of doing in their fantasies.

I’ve dealt with Clovers who rocked up to 30 (or more) over the posted limit, just to try to prevent me from passing them. That’s apparently not “dangerous speeding” in Clover’s world. I’ve even had a Clover use his car to physically prevent me from passing, by moving his car in front of mine – in the other lane (the passing lane).

That’s not “dangerous,” either.

clover king

 

All this woman had to do – if she thought I was driving too slowly – was go around me. She had a Corvette. The road was straight, the way was clear for literally half a mile. But, no. She tailgates me instead.

Aggressively. Clovers love aggression; it is their marinade.

This manifests as just described. The defining characteristic of a Clover is that he or she will not move over, ever. They believe they own the road.

Own you.

It’s the thread that runs through everything involving Clovers – on the road and off. They can’t abide the ebb and flow of peaceful, cooperative human interaction. It’s their way uber alles. 

And boy, do they get angry when anyone dares to do otherwise.

Throw it in the Woods?  

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  104 comments for “Corvette Clover!

  1. June 21, 2014 at 3:40 am

    Cloverina__It seems you finally had to choose__I guess there was no other way__Between self love and satin shoes__I knew the words you’d have to say

    It all began so long ago__That the memory’s hardly clear__But when I see you drive by I know__Half your love I’ll always share

    Cloverina when you drive by there’s music__Colored lights illuminate your movement__Crowded halls anticipate your gentle smile__Cloverina from the first I knew that__You would always have to dance I knew that__There would surely come a day when you would go__Baby I know…

    Dance for me, I beg of you, dance for me__Dance for me, Cloverina, dance for me

    Cloverina when you dance there’s music__Colored lights illuminate your movement__Crowded halls anticipate your gentle smile

    Moonlight Cloverina – Styx
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFZfzUTXQEI

  2. June 19, 2014 at 3:19 pm

    @eric,
    you’re making the error of considering clover’s eructations to be argumentum per os(a.p.o)
    argument by mouth

    they’re all argumentum per rectum (a.p.R)
    argument by rectum

    attempting intake of cloveric discourse via aurus dextra(a.d), aurus sinistra(a.s), or auris utraque(a.u) both ears, is of no avail

    They are seeming more lucid, thanks our efforts, but still undeterred from their foolish paths.

    doctor’s orders for clover remains mittite in silvis(m.i.s) throw in the woods

    more sig codes
    a.c. ante cibum before meals
    a.s.t. ante super tributa before forced taxation/labor
    ad lib. ad libitum use as much as one desires;
    agit agita stir/shake
    alt. h. alternis horis every other hour
    a.m.m. ad manu medicae at doctors hand
    aq aqua water
    A.T.C. around the clock
    BDS/bds bis die sumendum twice daily
    bol. bolus as a large single dose
    B.S. blood sugar
    B.S.A body surface areas
    BUCC bucca inside cheek
    cap., caps. capsula capsule
    CST Continue same treatment
    D5W dextrose 5% solution
    D5NS dextrose 5% in normal saline (0.9%)
    D.A.W. dispense as written (no generic)
    d.t.d. dentur tales doses give of such doses
    DTO deodorized tincture of opium
    D.W. distilled water
    e.m.p. ex modo prescripto as directed
    et et and
    eod every other day
    ft. fiat make; let it be made
    H hypodermic
    ID intradermal
    IM intramuscular
    IP intraperitoneal
    IVP intravenous push
    L.A.S. label as such
    LCD coal tar solution
    liq liquor solution
    MAE Moves All Extremities
    mane mane in the morning
    m.d.u. more dicto utendus to be used as directed
    mitte mitte send
    N.M.T. not more than
    noct. nocte at night
    non rep. non repetatur no repeats
    NS normal saline (0.9%)
    1/2NS half normal saline (0.45%)
    N.T.E. not to exceed
    od omne in die every day/once daily
    om omne mane every morning
    on omne nocte every night
    PRN, prn pro re nata as needed
    PV per vaginam via the vagina
    QWK every week
    R rectal
    rep., rept. repetatur repeats
    s.a. secundum artem according to the art sig signa write on label
    SL sublingually, under the tongue
    sol solutio solution
    s.o.s., si op. sit si opus sit if there is a need
    SSI sliding scale insulin
    SNRI (antidepressant) Serotonin–norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor
    SSRI (antidepressant) selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor
    stat statim immediately
    SubQ subcutaneously
    supp suppositorium suppository
    susp suspension
    syr syrupus syrup
    tab tabella tablet
    tal., t talus such
    top. topical
    T.P.N. total parenteral nutrition
    tr, tinc., tinct. tincture
    troche trochiscus lozenge
    ung. unguentum ointment
    U.S.P. United States Pharmacopoeia
    vag vaginally
    w with
    w/a while awake
    ℞ recipe take, take this, or take thus

    – if we want things done our way, we need our own shorthand, and to be our own doctors

    • Eightsouthman
      June 19, 2014 at 11:09 pm

      Well said Tor. I realize I’m crude but I think I can sum it all up in one word…..Pussies

      • June 20, 2014 at 1:39 am

        If I recall what twisted sister taught me, latin for pussy was debent.

        Yup, type in google box: “vagina translate latin” and you get debent.

        ewww. look what Romans compare pussies to…

        debent definition:
        sheath, scabbard, case, vagina, hull, husk

        Scabbard, husk?! Such romantics, those Romans!

        O Claudius, methinks thou art merely a husk hound!

    • helot
      June 20, 2014 at 3:46 am

      RE: “- if we want things done our way, we need [..] to be our own doctors”

      Crap, we’re gonna die! … Maybe.

      debent

      Being your own doctor is fringgin’ hard! Especially when you’re hip to how Western medicine is the biggest killer of them all.

      Thank goodness for Margret Durst and Dr. Mercola. I think they gave me/us ten extra years. But like it matters? We’re freakin’ old, and, W.F.D. …Living in the land of Vampires and The Walking Dead… Heck, even the young guy on Duck Dynasty gets it.

      …Maybe instead of saying, ” I resolve to serve no more” people just give up and quit?

      I wonder.

  3. June 18, 2014 at 5:09 pm

    Bravo Paula! Like a lightning bolt of truth.

    Here’s the second Persian Letter from Montesquieu:

    Usbek to the chief black Eunuch, at his Seraglio in Ispahan
    http://rbsche.people.wm.edu/teaching/plp/letter2.html

    Clover sees his impotence as his greatest feature. As a self-made eunuch, he enjoys the status of the perfect servant. The slave of slaves. He lives to keep women unsullied and men unblemished. He does this by prohibiting and thwarting all action not explicitly sanctioned by his master.

    When any authority figure approaches him, he completely shuts down any vestigal autonomy and virility he still retains.His self-suppression is the root of his cries for violence and his uncontrolled lashing out and vicious attack on any he feel have wronged him or in anyway impeded his sacred eunuch’s duty of fealty to authority.

    He is rich beyond our comprehension. He has a noble sacred purpose. He is part of the greatest empire of the world. The noblest one. The one with the highest ideals in the history of empire. He is the perfect being.
    – – – –
    LETTER 2
    Usbek to the chief black Eunuch, at his Seraglio in Ispahan

    You(Clover) are the faithful keeper of the most loveliest women in Persia; I have entrusted you with what in this world is most dear to me; you bear the keys of those fatal doors which are opened only for me.

    Whilst you watch over this precious storehouse of my affections, my heart, at rest, enjoys an absolute freedom from care. You guard it in the silence of the night as well as in the bustle of the day.

    Your un-relaxing care sustains virtue when it wavers. Should the women whom you guard incline to swerve from their duty, you would destroy their hopes in the bud. You are the scourge of vice, and the very monument of fidelity.

    You command them and they obey. You fulfill implicitly all their desires, and exact from them a like obedience to the laws of the seraglio; you take a pride in rendering them the meanest services; you submit to their lawful commands with reverence and in dread; you serve them like the slave of their slaves. But, resuming your power, you command imperiously, as my representative, whenever you apprehend any slackening of the laws of chastity and modesty.

    Never forget that I raised you from the lowest position among my slaves, to set you in your present place as the trusted guardian of the delights of my heart. Maintain the most humble bearing in the presence of those who partake my love; but, at the same time, make them deeply conscious of their own powerlessness.

    Provide for them all innocent pleasures; beguile them of their anxiety; entertain them with music, dancing, and delicious drinks; persuade them to meet together frequently. If they wish to go into the country, you may escort them thither; but lay hands on every man who dares to enter their presence.

    Exhort them to that cleanliness which is the symbol of the soul’s purity; speak sometimes of me. I long to see them again in that delightful place which they adorn. Farewell.
    Tauris, the 18th of the moon of Saphar, 1711.
    – – – –
    If that doesn’t nail the whole underpinnings of the stench of the American World Police Force, I don’t know what does.

    Oligarchs in London, Vatican, New York, and DC, have hand-picked the lowest slaves of slaves in the world and promoted them to the highest morality enforcers in the world.

    And these morality policeman are eternally greatful for it and are always vigilant and ever ready to eternally protect and serve their masters, even unto the very ends of the Earth itself.

    • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
      June 18, 2014 at 9:59 pm

      Or more simply put.. Punching himself in the face every time he fails to dominate and demean someone for his and his master’s insipid pleasure..

      • June 19, 2014 at 12:17 pm

        Well and succinctly said ЯΞ√Ω{_{_}T↑☼|\|
        http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/mod/montesquieu-spirit.asp

        Montesquieu, by virtue of being first, he makes peace or war, he punishes criminals, arbitrary control for…

        Again there is no liberty, if the judge might behave, with all the violence of an oppressor…

        One man need not be afraid, besides there are seasons, and republics, old customs of Rome…

        As all human things have an end, under those republics, many princes of Europe ought to be monarchs, even when the lion’s mouth,
        Becomes their home.

  4. Paula
    June 18, 2014 at 2:53 pm

    You do know that cloverism is a public expression of impotence, right? Not sexual impotence, although no doubt that goes with the territory often enough. I mean personal impotence, as a human being. These are people who cannot exist in and for themselves. They are nothing if others are not noticing them or being affected by them or being controlled by them, and preferably all three. There is no other explanation for someone driving 15 under the speed limit and then resenting it when she gets passed. There’s no other explanation for the assclown in the semi who slows down a mile before the construction zone and then tries to swing in front of you when he sees you passing him. The vaporing about safety is just window dressing and a feeble rationalization, because their universal impulse is to punish you for or to prevent you from disregarding them, i.e., from existing happily without them. You *will* notice them, dammit, and if they have to risk both your lives to do it, well, you see what kind of regard for life people with that attitude have. They despise their own impotent existence, so they have no regard for yours. No self-respect, either, which means they are incapable of respecting others or acknowledging that not everyone on the planet is content to operate their cars and their lives in a constant state of HUA.

    And by the way, Eric, I wish there were a better term for these people. “Clover” sounds so innocuous, and the mindset behind them is anything but. Can I campaign for “degenerate sub-animal trash” instead? Or what I personally resort to when I run into them, the useful “c–ksucker”?

    • eric
      June 18, 2014 at 2:57 pm

      I think you’ve nailed it, Paula –

      Control freaks are inadvertently expressing the impotence they feel; their own lack of control over their own lives.

      I also think that some of them are outright psychopaths – who get a charge from lording it over others.

      On “Clover” –

      I ran with it because of the persistence of our (self-named) Clover. Seemed to fit. Clover is bland and not much of a threat to your lawn or garden in small quantities. But it can really take off if you don’t take care to keep it in check.

      • to5
        June 18, 2014 at 9:52 pm

        Clover is a good description of the modern cop in the USSA(R)!!

    • Bevin
      June 19, 2014 at 11:30 pm

      Dear Paula,

      “These are people who cannot exist in and for themselves. They are nothing if others are not noticing them or being affected by them or being controlled by them, and preferably all three. ”

      Very astute observation.

      They are essentially what Nathaniel Branden and Ayn Rand referred to as “social metaphysicians.” Peter Keating was a more passive type. Ellsworth Toohey was a more aggressive and virulent type.

      Individualists don’t think in the same terms. Individualists have entirely different mindsets. Individualists inhabit an entirely different mental universe.

      The Fountainhead (1949)

      Ellsworth Toohey: There’s the building that should have been yours. There are buildings going up all over the city which are great chances refused and given to incompetent fools. You’re walking the streets while they’re doing the work that you love but cannot obtain. This city is closed to you. It is I who have done it! Don’t you want to know my motive?

      Howard Roark: No!

      Ellsworth Toohey: I’m fighting you and shall fight you in every way I can.

      Howard Roark: You’re free to do what you please!

      Ellsworth Toohey: Mr. Roark, we’re alone here. Why don’t you tell me what you think of me in any words you wish.

      Howard Roark: But I don’t think of you!

      [Roark walks away and Toohey’s head slumps down]

      • Garysco
        June 19, 2014 at 11:40 pm

        @ Bevin – “But I don’t think of you!” Has always been the highest form of insult hasn’t it? The Chinese must have a proverb buried in their treasure chest of wisdom for that one.

        • Bevin
          June 20, 2014 at 12:11 am

          Dear Gary,

          Come to think of it, you’re right!

          It’s not exact, but there is a phrase in Chinese that expresses roughly the same sentiment.

          沒有看在眼裡

          mei yu kan zai yan li

          It means “don’t even see the person.” Not literally, but figuratively. It means that one is a total non-entity that one can’t even be bothered to notice.

  5. richb
    June 17, 2014 at 6:44 pm

    Had a tailgater once that I just couldn’t shake. I was going over the limit, like I always do on that particular tollway (I-294 outside Chicago, nobody gets stopped for speeding it seems, the cops spend their days ticketing truckers). Traffic generally run 75+ on there during non rush hours.

    I had just done some work on my Chevelle, and so I was doing 65 instead of my usual 85 making sure the car was ok. But it was night, traffic was light, and there is 4 lanes in each direction, and I was in the right lane so was in the way of nobody.

    Or so I thought.

    Soon I had someone behind me, he got closer and closer. Keep in mind there are 4 lanes 3 of which are completely empty, probably nobody a mile in front of me, and nobody but this clover for a mile behind me. I am also going 65 as well.

    Figures too, when you want to observe the car engine and such, and I have a idiot on my bumper. Murphy law strictly enforced that night. Damn he was close too, he must have been as close as six inches at times. And since there are plenty of lanes to pick, why should I move for a tailgater when in the right lane already and if I did, would he just follow me (you know those “pacer” clovers, that don’t pay attention, who would probably follow you off a cliff) onto the shoulder? Or worse, a carjacker? So I slow down, hoping to encourage him to go around. 55, nope, 45 nope, 35 nope, come on!!! OK, now I am going to play now, how slow will it take for you to get off my ass? Put hazards on, 35, nope, 25 nope, 15, 10 finally when I was going 5 mph I get to the tollbooth. So I pay the toll with pennies (you can do that in Illinois), one at a time, all 40 cents worth. So at least I got my pound of flesh. ha ha. Finally the gate goes up, and I gun it for the exit which is just past that toll booth, since he had to pay his toll I wanted to lose this guy bad.

    A friend of mine once picked up a pacer clover on the same tollway. Not one that follows, but one that stays glued to you in your blind spot on the right. So you can’t get over, you know that type. But his wife notices that the guy is looking at them for some reason, not the road. What the h@ll, he is thinking. So this goes on for miles, and they get to that same tollbooth and since that guy isn’t watching the road, hits the concrete divider between the lanes at full speed, since my friend brakes at the last minute because he wanted to see if he would pace him all the way to the booth. He flips over and takes out the whole toll booth (thankfully it was unmanned) and destroyed it. This clover was completely upside down, and he managed to tie up traffic for hours………….

    • BrentP
      June 17, 2014 at 7:55 pm

      Oh the troopers do ticket on I-294. I know this for a fact. For years I avoided I-294 just because of that.

      With I-pass there aren’t many exact change toll booths any more. But yeah paying with pennies was the way to put that pile of pennies to use.

      With blind spot clovers I wait until there is nobody behind me and brake hard. It’s bewildering to them and they can’t maintain their lock. They usually go off and lock on to someone else. Getting one to crash into the toll booth, now that’s somethin’ if true.

      • MikeFromWichita
        June 18, 2014 at 10:46 am

        CloverGreat ‘NAP’ story there, not! Seems that the usual suspects here today are just itching to cut loose their Inner Urban Feral and freak havoc.

        • eric
          June 18, 2014 at 10:51 am

          Sorry, Clover – no sale.

          Defensive force is regrettable but justifiable.

          Aggressive (first use) of force never is.

          You seem unable to comprehend the difference. Or you just don’t care.

          Cry “safety”!

          That’s what matters most to you.

      • David Ward
        June 19, 2014 at 6:40 pm

        Dayum! I’d pay good money to watch that. Can we get video? Start a paying youtube channel for Eric of terminally stupid CLOVERS meeting Darwin? What a concept……

        David Ward
        Anarcho-Captialist
        Memphis, Tn.

        PS. Yeah, I’m 61, I’m a motorcycle rider and I’m heavyset. But hell I got it honestly! Really I swear I did!

      • Garysco
        June 19, 2014 at 7:32 pm

        @BrentP – i bet you were never one of those who lurched 1 foot at the red light to get the guy next to you to run the red. :)
        P.S. – It usually worked.

        • BrentP
          June 19, 2014 at 10:02 pm

          Never did that one. But clovers do take all their cues from those around them. One clover fall asleep at the light and all of them do.

          • eric
            June 20, 2014 at 6:22 am

            Yup!

            Another case in point:

            Two left turn lanes. But Clovers will all line up in one lane, leaving the other empty – and blocked.

    • Eric_G
      June 17, 2014 at 8:11 pm

      Happens to me all the time. The other thing is someone creeps up behind me, gets into the passing lane and then just sits there. At night he’s blinding me with the side view mirror, during the day he’s blocking me behind trucks. I slow down, he slows down. I speed up, he speeds up. I look back and see that he’s on the phone. I get it now. I slow way way down (as long as there’s no one behind me, which out here in the sticks is usually the case) he wakes up and realizes what is going on and gets back to driving again.

      Happens more on Fridays and weekends than during the rest of the week.

  6. helot
    June 17, 2014 at 5:54 pm

    “They’re” Never ever going to Wake The Fuck Up, are they?

    I’m freaking dreaming, ain’t I?

    That thought just occurred to me.

    Maybe after, ‘The Collapse’?

    IF it’s allowed to happen without interruption, which such things are never allowed to proceed without interruption by TPTB.

    See also: ‘Directed history’.

    Crap, suddenly I’ve got this W.F.D. x2 feeling.

  7. C C
    June 17, 2014 at 5:25 pm

    Such behavior prevails as helicopter parents become empty nesters and no child left behind reach adulthood. Short attention spans, zero critical reasoning, narcissism, no common sense, one-dimensional thinking in a three-dimensional world and delusional need for control.

    Welcome to the future. Clovers and Snowflakes as far as the eye can see.

    • helot
      June 17, 2014 at 5:46 pm

      “Clovers and Snowflakes as far as the eye can see.”

      I like that. Got a reference point for the ‘snowflakes’ bit?

      Or, is that what you meant by your description of ‘helicopter parents’?

      I think, maybe.

      Gawd they freak me out.

      But there is this one that mows her lawn while wearing a bikini while smoking a cigarette… but today she hired some dude to do it for her.
      Sigh.

      When the clovers of the world cut me off in traffic I have boatloads of patience for them (I’m not sure why) and when the snowflakes of the world mow their lawn that way, I don’t mind watching.
      I dream of the day the all Wake The Fuck, UP.
      That would be cool.
      I won’t hold my breath, though.

      • helot
        June 17, 2014 at 5:48 pm

        Er, “I dream of the day THEY all Wake The Fuck, UP.”

        EDIT the organic.

      • C C
        June 17, 2014 at 7:08 pm

        Helocopter parents – those overbearing adults obsessively over-involved in every aspect of their children’s lives with high expectations of outrageous rewards for mediocrity.

        Snowflakes – the spawn of helocopter parents that are rewarded for mediocrity to the detriment of everyone earning outstanding achievements. Parents perceive their little snowflakes as unique and fragile individuals, everyone else perceives them as entitled brats.

        • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
          June 17, 2014 at 9:27 pm

          The “everyone-wins-a-trophy-day” generation, with helicopter parents in tow. That must be the answer.

      • Eric_G
        June 17, 2014 at 8:06 pm

        Snowflake == every child is special and unique and deserves a trophy.

  8. MikeFromWichita
    June 17, 2014 at 12:55 pm

    CloverGreat display of lack of Class there Eric. Your ACTION was as clear an NAP violation as there can be. Yeppers folks like you when vexed at ALL not going their way are why 99.99% of the People will always trust the State more than they trust your philosophy.Clover

    • Boothe
      June 17, 2014 at 1:34 pm

      MFW – Congratulations on consistently seeing nearly everything around you from the bass-ackwards perspective (and I mean that in the most cranio-rectally inverted way). Let’s put it in terms simple enough for someone from the “Free Soil” state to understand. You’ve got someone who should be paying attention to their driving, but instead they’re fooling with their phone (or maybe an “intimate toy”) thereby impeding traffic. You pass them. After a few miles they quit diddling themself, realize you passed them and (thinking with their glands) they get mad. Then they obvioulsy exceed the speed limit to catch up with you so they can ride your bumper. Now based on the previous “driving skills” this idiot exhibited, the best thing for her was a brake check. As Eric pointed out, all she had to do was pass if she had suddenly gotten in an all fired hurry. But no she decided to violate the NAP by practicing unsafe following distance and that’s childish behavior. She needed a good slap, back when she was five. Instead she got a brake check; same type of negative feedback. And I’ll bet you’ve done it before too. Eric was merely the porcupine to her (literally, in all likelihood) “cougar.” Don’t like quills in your snout? Well then don’t prod the porcupine. Duhhh.

      • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
        June 17, 2014 at 9:20 pm

        I’ve been brake-checked myself only 2 times ever. Both from women pacing the car next to them and I was over 50 metres behind them. Seems like they do it to everyone. I’d hate to be their mechanic.

        MFW is obviously one of them and very likely has a driving record of exactly the same violations the length of a toilet roll printed in 6 point font..

      • MikeFromWichita
        June 18, 2014 at 8:43 am

        Got It Boothe!!!! NAP is whatever you and your say it is. Clover

        Tell ya what – pull your head out of your ass and smell the morning coffee (to jump start your brain) or at least something other than the BS you feel to be wisdom. What Eric did was just about the most reckless aggressive act a person can commit on the road. That he might have felt put upon is no excuse.

        Folks like you & Eric give Freedom a bad name.

        • eric
          June 18, 2014 at 9:11 am

          No, Clover –

          The NAP is: do not commit aggressive violence. A clear, objective standard. This definition has been explained to you numerous times, so please don’t feign ignorance or misunderstanding.

          Why must you Clovers always lie/distort/evade?

          The Corvette driver used her car to bully me. In a way that was also extremely dangerous. Or do you approve of inches-off-the-bumper tailgating and barreling down on other drivers at 30 over the speed limit?

          I responded to her aggression. I defended myself against her aggression.

          • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
            June 18, 2014 at 9:25 pm

            Methinks Mike is an antagonist and a bully, someone who abhors others freedoms, except his own. A selfish pig of the highest order, that will lie, cajole and manipulate others for his own gains. A grabbermint stooge.

            Bet he’d brake-check anyone, or worse, just to antagonise and give himself some satisfaction, that he can put one over someone for the day. It’s his mission in life

            What an unhappy arsehole he is. That will stand as his life achievement, probably written on his tombstone.

        • Bill in IL
          June 18, 2014 at 10:08 am

          Reading your posts Mikey, makes me laugh and cry at the same time. I laugh because you are clearly a brain washed sheep completely incapable of thinking for yourself and wouldn’t understand freedom if it bit you. You posts exhibit poor grammar, lack of critical thinking skills and absolutely no concept of human history. But then I cry, because people like you are the reason this country has sunk to the level we find ourselves in today, a growing, metastasizing police state under 24/7 surveillance with ever diminishing freedom and wealth. A shrinking middle class and a growing risk of war and economic disaster. So, thank – you Mikey, and the rest of your ilk, for destroying the best, most prosperous country on the planet. Thank – you for the death of opportunities, the wasting of once great cities, the influx of illegal immigrants, the growth of multi – national corporations, the recklessness of politicians, thank – you Mikey, for all you have done and continue to do to us, good and hard. We really appreciate your abysmal efforts!

        • Boothe
          June 18, 2014 at 10:49 am

          MFW – I don’t tailgate. Period. That’s the way I want to be treated. I will even give you a couple of warning taps to flash the brake lights first. Most decent folks back off. But if you persist in following too close, then you’re the one aggressing, not me. It’s bullying, plain and simple; so expect negative feedback. When I was quite young, we had a bully in my class who was two years older than the rest of us (I think he was Wichita too, must be something in the water…). He’d beat on the littler kids on the school bus, knock our books in the floor and push down in between the seats. One day I’d had enough and when he tried to push me down into the floor I punched straight up, sight unseen and connected right in his mouth. You know what Mike, he never did it again. Negative feedback stops that kind of thing.

          It sounds to me like you’re the kind of ass that will tailgate someone or you wouldn’t be worried about a brake check, now would you? If you’re following so close in a modern vehicle with good brakes that you’re worried about the other driver applying their brakes, you’ve got no business being on the road in first place. And that is especially so if you doing this in a clear passing zone or the vehicle ahead of you is trapped behind slower traffic. Tailgating is the truly dangerous activity, because if an animal runs into the road or someone pulls out in front of you, that bumper riding moron (who isn’t going to get to their destination one second quicker) very well may hit you. But you already know that don’t you? And as you also know, a rear end collision is almost invariably deemed the fault of the person following. Why? Because if you’re paying attention and not tailgating, it is 100% preventable. So do you tailgate much Mike? Or do you just like to come here to show your ignorance and be contrary?

          • to5
            June 18, 2014 at 9:44 pm

            When I was in grade school, there was a fat boy named dennis who kept bullying me. Over a period of days, when he came in the classroom from playtime, he would plop down on his curved plywood seat with 4 silver rivet heads in it. I came in early one day & rummaged through the teachers desk and saw clear tape and 4 silver thumbtacks.

            I taped them to the seat. He came in as scheduled and duly plopped his fat ass onto 4 thumbtacks with the pointed end up and taped to the chair. As soon as he hit the tacks, he came off the chair and created quyite a commotion.

            The nun asked what was going on. “Sister, someone taped some tacks onto my chair”

            Nun’s reply: “Well Dennis is you wouldn’t bully other children on the playground maybe they wouldn’t do this to you. Now, sit down and shut up.”

            Fat boy never bothered anyone again.

    • Inconsistencies
      June 17, 2014 at 1:44 pm

      I don’t understand how someone can know about the NAP and reject it. I was once like you, Mike. Very recently, in fact. I believed that if there were no laws, society would fall. I honked at speeders. I admired the politicians and their enforcers. Then, finding myself in a dark time in my life, lost, believe it or not, I prayed (something I haven’t done since I was a child) for wisdom. I found writings on freedom and the state, Ron Paul, Andrew Napolitano, Lew Rockwell, etc… My life has not been the same since. Suddenly, the blinders are off. I can see clearly for the first time in my life. I have rejected the myth of authority and it has opened up my life to a freedom I never thought possible. How can one reject such concepts as individual freedom and voluntarism, unless one has a great stake in the power of the state? What is your motivation here on this site? Can you answer that honestly?

      • June 18, 2014 at 10:34 am

        “How can one reject such concepts as individual freedom and voluntarism, unless one has a great stake in the power of the state? What is your motivation here on this site? Can you answer that honestly?”
        Clover
        Inconsistencies – You presume waaaayyyyyy too much. When have I ever said I ” reject such concepts as individual freedom and voluntarism”, that I have “a great stake in the power of the state” or that the NAP is NOT a sound principle for the functioning of a just society? What I have done is attempt to indirectly flesh out the NAP by semi-good natured ridicule of the rather common pompous and arrogant attitude of the plurality here who seem to feel that the NAP is their personal get out of jail free card for whatever cool self-gratifying activity they currently which to engage in which presents a clear and present danger to the personal safety and property of others.

      • Eightsouthman
        June 19, 2014 at 10:39 pm

        MIW, what’s so hard to understand about blocking traffic? I took off this morning(June 19)and had work to do. I come up on a guy I saw long before I ever left the town I fueled in. I come on this elderly(even older than me)woman in a fairly new Chevy pickup behind that same a-hole in an old Chevy pulling a shitty 16′ trailer with an old tractor on board. So he pulls over and lets us bye….not. Just another dumbass willing to bring everybody on a road with a PSL of 75 to a brisk 45. The woman following was tailing way back so I was having to do double duty just to pass. I finally found(it was in an area with some steep hills and dubious safe passing)a chance and begin a pass around both of them since she seemed to be following him. Ok, think myself to myself, she’s an accomplice to this stupid shit’s screwing up. I have to use 9th gear and glad the old Cat had the balls to bring the rig up to 75, my max since I’m speed limited, and get around both of them. Next thing I know, she’s passing the stupid shit AFTER I had. Gee thanks you incompetent a-holes. Try hustling 80,000 lbs down a two lane road with idiots like that. Of course if an accident had occurred for some reason, the press would have said “driver of 18 wheeler had been up 24 hrs” like they did about the Walmart driver that I can assure you isn’t the truth. I drive with my lights on mostly in a T-800 KW that’s a damned big rig. Why is it so hard to see? Then I spent the rest of the day trying to avoid farmers with huge implements who couldn’t seem to see me even though I could see them just fine at a great distance. Of course wetbacks on cellphones on huge tractors have more important things to do that avoid big rigs. Evidently, everybody has more important things to do than avoid big rigs. I’ve never had an accident in 45 years of driving a big rig but I know tomorrow might be the day it all ends…..and it will be because somebody thinks I can stop 42 tons in a 100 feet.

        Please clovers, get outta the friggin way and save everybody’s lives. What is it you don’t understand? Don’t play those stupid games with me cause I can’t stop when you’re being cute. And when I run over your stupid ass, they’ll drag my ass in for a drug test, even if you run into the back of me while I’m stopped at a light, and immediately assume I’m to blame. Guilty until proven innocent.

        • eric
          June 20, 2014 at 6:15 am

          Morning, Eight!

          I see that a lot – the stuff you described. I-81 (as I’m sure you know) is a major north-south truck route and the routine idiocy I see car drivers perform around big rigs never fails to appall me. I do my damnedest to drive the interstate at night only. I find you’re dealing with a better class of people around 2 in the morning than 2 in the afternoon!

    • eric
      June 17, 2014 at 2:28 pm

      Really, Mike?

      All I did was pass this woman – who was forcing other drivers to slow to a speed well below the posted legal limit, wasting their time. Exceptionally inconsiderate – and, aggressive. She used her car to block the free flow of traffic.

      I went on my way, in no way aggressing against her. Or do you consider my passing this Clover somehow aggressive?

      After I passed her, she behaved very aggressively toward me. She ran up on my truck at high speed – easily 30 over the posted limit. Then did not pass – even though the opposite lane was completely clear and it was legal for her to do. Instead, she literally draws her car to within a couple feet of my truck’s bumper to try to make a point or intimidate me. Again, she’s being aggressive – not me.

      So I stabbed my brakes, to impress on her that she was following way too closely. And to back the fuck off.

      And you think I was in the wrong…

      Ah, the mind of a Clover!

      • helot
        June 17, 2014 at 3:13 pm

        RE: “Ah, the mind of a Clover!”

        Ha. Reminds me somewhat of the old commercial, “The mind of Minolta”.

        TPTB just create a blueprint for what and how they want people to think and Bam’O, Prest’O! Copy and paste the thought process onto as many as they can via the many channels they control. TV, radio, magazines, schools, popular culture (think Travistock and the so-called ‘cultural revolution’ of the 1960’s as described by the elves at The Daily Bell) add a dash of edicts from down on high by all the various controllers such as the PTA, the local gooberment and the upper levels of gunvernment, and just about everyone becomes pliable Plastic People, you know, like Stretch Armstrong.

      • MikeFromWichita
        June 18, 2014 at 9:05 am

        Eric- no doubt the woman behaved badly but so did you. The pair of you together showed all of the maturity of a pair of head-butting bystander shooting urban ferals battling for dominance in their squalid ‘hood’.Clover

        • eric
          June 18, 2014 at 9:19 am

          There was no problem, Clover, until the Clover used her vehicle to assault me. By literally trying to force me off the road.

          I remind you: Open road, legal passing zone. She could easily have passed me if she simply wanted to go faster than I was driving (just as I passed her when she was driving slowly). Instead, she chose to use her car as a cudgel, to try to intimidate (that is, to threaten) me by riding my ass at high speed.

          How is this any different than a bully walking up to you on the street and using his body to try to shove you out of his way? In such a case, would it be wrong to let the bully know – in terms he understands – that you will not accept being bullied?

          • Jean
            June 18, 2014 at 9:53 am

            Well, if you turn around and hit the bully, even if they are LOOKING for a fight, YOU go to prison.
            That is the premise of most of law enforcement, too.
            “I’m not touching you!” (Screamed at 180 DB from a distance of a half-inch away)
            With current laws (and it actually applies to those who do NOT have a badge, too), you’re not allowed to wipe the spittle off your face, and beat the shit out of someone who obviously wants to get hurt.
            Worse when they have a badge, as they’re then ENTITLED to detain and beat you and analy probe you and strip search you and take your DNA and even murder you, with the whole weight of armored vehicles, automatic weapons, squads of men, snipers, helicopters, license plate cameras, and drones – and a rubber stamp of approval from the rest of guvvermint and “The People” (Consenting governed cowed.

          • MikeFromWichita
            June 18, 2014 at 10:40 am

            and acting with the wounded ego of an urban feral made the situation better just how?Clover

            • eric
              June 18, 2014 at 10:45 am

              She backed off my tail, Clover.

              Lesson learned.

              I never hit first. But I assert my right to hit back.

              Get it?

          • MikeFromWichita
            June 18, 2014 at 5:33 pm

            “Clover used her vehicle to assault me. By literally trying to force me off the road. ”

            LMAO………….that sounds so very like a big strong man crying Rape.Clover

            • eric
              June 18, 2014 at 7:51 pm

              Non sequitur, Clover.

              Typical.

              Corvette driver came at me; I responded with “back the fuck off.”

              It never ceases to amaze me how you Clovers conflate/confuse aggressive vs. defensive force.

              I did nothing to the Corvette driver … until (and not before) the Corvette driver did something to me.

              I responded to her aggressive act. In other words, I responded defensively.

              You have spent multiple posts denouncing my defensive response. But said virtually nothing about the Corvette driver’s actions which incited the response.

              It’s of a piece with the original Clover’s bleat that you never have to worry about men in funny costumes pointing guns at you… so long as you do as ordered.

    • PreacherRye
      June 17, 2014 at 3:01 pm

      I just want to reinforce that I believe a lot of readers here appreciate it when you let clover comments through. I know I do.

      I literally cannot comprehend a group of people so afraid to be free. As has been pointed out here many times, the best explanation is their projection. They must just be scared to death of what they would personally do with that freedom, hence why they fear of everyone else so much.

      • clover
        June 18, 2014 at 10:27 pm

        CloverPreacherRye you say I am afraid to be free because I do not want your anything goes society. Tell me one society that has no rules that actually worked? Name just one. The society I live in has worked very well for me and my family for centuries and you want to screw it up with your test society of 400 million people? I tell you what PreacherRye, get a few thousand people together and start your own city with anything goes and see how it works. There is nothing that will stop it. Yes I know there is a state or two without income taxes and if you have your own community there could be little or no property taxes because most of them are set by your own community. What is stopping you from starting your test community? That seems to be the answer to all of your complaints. You get it to work and you can expand it to your state. Show us the facts by using your own example. Are you all chickens for not trying such a thing?

        • eric
          June 19, 2014 at 5:38 am

          Clover, it’s not anything goes.” It’s don’t harm others. You and your ilk have to rely on the former – a lie – to try to undermine the latter.

          And it’s not working anymore.

          I’m sure the current regime – which allows you to satisfy your sick control freak fetish (and probably “earn” your living through rent-seeking or some other form of parasitism at gunpoint) – has indeed “worked very for you.

        • Bevin
          June 19, 2014 at 8:16 am

          Clover writes

          ” What is stopping you from starting your test community? ”

          Tell me he’s kidding.

          Does he really not know that his fellow clovers track us down and stop us from “starting our own test communities?”

          Battle for the California Desert: Why is the Government Driving Folks off Their Land?
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yw3RiMdS7sE

          • eric
            June 19, 2014 at 9:16 am

            He’s not. He’s that dense. Or, that evil.

            I’d bet him a “million dollars” (I can afford to, as he already owes me several) that if say 100 of us got together, bought a tract of land fair and square and agreed to remain on that land, not availing ourselves of any “services” provided by the government, living entirely off our land, keeping to ourselves entirely, Clover and Co. would still not leave us alone.

            The proof? That situation already obtains for probably most of us here. I, for example, bought my land fair and square and impose no costs whatever on the county. Yet Clover & Co. dictate that I must be hooked up to the electrical grid – or else. That I may not put an addition on “my” house without permission (and fees paid) and, of course, that I must pay for the education of other people’s kids, thug cop “protection” I feel no need of … and so on.

            Clover & Co. won’t leave anyone alone and in peace – ever.

            We are living in a kind of Cold Civil War situation; irreconcilable differences. We’d be content to part ways peacefully. Leave them their Clovertopia in exchange for leaving us to our Libertopia.

            But, no.

            Just like the Yankees of another time, they’ll impose their way at bayonet point.

            Or try to.

            Perhaps the outcome this time will be different.

          • Bevin
            June 19, 2014 at 9:50 am

            Dear Eric,

            Yeah. Hopefully the Bundy Ranch confrontation will not be another Waco.

            Not that I would bet a million dollars on it of course.

        • PreacherRye
          June 19, 2014 at 5:53 pm

          You’ve already been handed your hat by the other posters here regarding your “anything goes” strawman that you are constantly beating up around here.. That said, if I could go run a test society and be left in peace by you moochers I’d do just that. As Eric clearly pointed out, you won’t leave me alone, you won’t leave me in peace, and you won’t quit sticking a gun in my hip.

          No, I guess you don’t stick the gun in my hip yourself, I suspect you are too much of a coward to do that. You just send men in your stead to do the dirty work for you.

          As I’m sure you well know, there was a time in America when the federal gov’t wasn’t yet powerful enough and didn’t have the ability to harass and steal from the people. There was a time when most people had virtually no interaction with government thugs at all. And guess what? Shockingly of course, everyone wasn’t slitting each other’s throats.

          • Eightsouthman
            June 19, 2014 at 10:53 pm

            No shit Preacher. This is the kind of dick that will pull right out in front of a big rig and watch to see what you do in response. I admit, I can be caught in that mood that I’m ready to run your ass down and clovers aren’t so stupid they don’t understand when you just keep balling the jack even though they’re going much slow that maybe, just maybe they’d better use that part of the go pedal they’re so scared of and not get their asses run over. When I can’t see the car in front of me, I can only hope they have more fear than I do…..and I do have a great deal of fear since I don’t wish to harm anyone but what the hell are you supposed to do with 40 tons at 80 mph when some a-hole pulls out right in front of you and wants to show you they can stop you……only you can’t stop and they damned sure can’t stop you. Stupid is as stupid does.

      • MikeFromWichita
        June 19, 2014 at 10:56 am

        “I responded to her aggressive act. In other words, I responded defensively. ”

        I’m sure she would say the same about how your AGGRESSION in her eyes started the whole thing. Again you displayed EXACTLY the same sort of response to a diss that keeps the feral self-inflicted body count high every weekend in Chicago.

        • eric
          June 19, 2014 at 2:30 pm

          Excuse me, Clover?

          I passed her. In a legal passing zone. Didn’t tailgate. Didn’t “cut her off.” She was doing maybe 44 in a 55 – and I passed her, moved over and continued on my way.

          How is that in any way “aggressive”?

          In her eyes, perhaps – and yours. But in actuality?

          Uh, no.

          How much does Rush Limbaugh pay you to troll here, by the way?

          • Boothe
            June 19, 2014 at 4:58 pm

            Eric – I have to wonder where MFW comes up with this shit. As I posted above, and to which he didn’t respond, MFW is probably a tailgater. He responds to the threat of correction for his bad behavior the same way any bully does; Zero tolerance! And “zero tolerance” is why bullying has gotten so bad on school grounds these days. All these brainwashed sheeple in the school administratio cry foul if a kid defendd him/herself from a bully. And if he wasn’t a tailgating bully, why would a brake check bother him so?

            Equating you brake checking a woman tailgating you in a 3300 lb. vehicle to a “big strong man crying rape” amounts to nothing more than ad absurdum. Mike, how about you square off with a 110 lb. woman holding a .38 sometime and see how a piece of machinery can “even the odds” so to speak. You’ll be a whole letter better off getting hit by a 280 lb. body-builder on a bicycle than a 120 lb. cougar in a ‘Vette. I’ve read enough of your posts to know you’re not stupid. So that leaves me with the impression that you’re just an obstinate ass who can’t admit he’s wrong and must resort to ad hominem when he has no valid argument. Pathetic.

    • Bevin
      June 18, 2014 at 9:53 pm

      “Your ACTION was as clear an NAP violation as there can be. ”

      Seriously???

      Like I said, the Three Clover Stooges are non compos mentis.

  9. Gabe
    June 17, 2014 at 9:45 am

    Being one state south, I understand your pain.
    The worst with these Clovers is when you get to either a passing zone or four-lane stretch and as they’re getting into it, they automatically speed up. You may have not even tried passing yet, but they have just sped up, so your work is that much harder.
    In my 25 years of driving all over the country, I’ll say the three worst Clover groups are:
    Old men. Slow, always unsure of where they’re going, turn left with a right directional, etc. Put a hat on them and you might as well call it a day because it just got worse.
    Young black men. Hate, hate, HATE being passed and will do everything possible to prevent you, including after you pass them, they pass you on a double-yellow and slow back down.
    Black women. Left lane hogs and slow as can be. They won’t move over for anyone. I watched one for a good 3-4 miles on I95 run the left lane, not passing anyone and keeping pace with the car next to her, with a state trooper right on her bumper (talk about Clovers) and she just kept right on driving without a care in the world.

    • Jason Flinders
      June 17, 2014 at 10:21 am

      “Old men. Slow, always unsure of where they’re going, turn left with a right directional, etc. Put a hat on them and you might as well call it a day because it just got worse.”

      Hey, I resemble that remark! I’m an old man and I wear a hat. However, I don’t misuse turn signals or hold up traffic. If you think you’re going to be young forever — think again. Inside every old man is a young man wondering what the hell happened.

      • Gabe
        June 17, 2014 at 11:54 am

        Mr. Jason, it was a generalization.
        I fully expect that when the hair greys and the bones creek, I’ll have people making comments on my driving. Hopefully, I’ll remember this mind I have now and still drive with others in mind.

        • Jason Flinders
          June 17, 2014 at 1:04 pm

          I figured that. :-) Getting older does not necessarily mean driving like a clover, though, as immortalized in the famous song by Jan and Dean…

      • ozymandias
        June 17, 2014 at 1:22 pm

        Old man look at my life,
        I’m a lot like you were. ~ neil (not so) young (anymore)

        old men, bold men, old bold men? not so much….

        • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
          June 17, 2014 at 9:37 pm

          There’s a saying: “There are old riders and bold riders, but there are no old and bold riders”. We all slow down with age. When I look back at the machines I’ve driven and ridden ALWAYS flat to the floor in my youth, I’m kinda surprised I never pranged anything, or worse. But I still try at every opportunity to open the taps. Far more exciting and stops me nodding off on long hauls.

    • Boothe
      June 17, 2014 at 10:21 am

      Yeah Gabe – A school mate of mine was going home from work (rural Virginia) when he encountered two “ladies” in big cars stopped, blocking the road he was attempting to travel, jabbering-jawing . He honked the horn and they ignored him. When he honked again, he said the one in his lane glared at him in her side view mirror. So he got out of his truck, walked up and politely asked them to move long enough for him to go home. At which point the beached whale in his lane responded “Ah pays mah taxes an’ I’ll sit here if I wants to!” So he got back in his truck, backed up for some running room and moved her car for her…the hard way. I’m sure it was quite satisfying but not the wisest thing to do. Let’s just say that you’re automatically at fault in a rear end collision of that nature and the sheriff’s dept. was waiting for him when he got out of the shower. He did get free room and board that night, plus he got to meet a real live magistrate too (sigh). But I’ll bet “the victim” and her accomplice thought twice about using a public road for a rest area after that.

      • eric
        June 17, 2014 at 12:36 pm

        Crikey.

        Something similar happened to me just yesterday. I decided to swing by Panera’s drive-thru to grab a sandwich. Ahead of me moseying through the parking lot is a (cue cliche) Buick LaCrosse with an old dude driving. He waddles his car directly down the middle of the travel aisle and stops in front of the front doors. No one can get by in either direction. If he’d hewed to his side of the lane, opposing traffic could have made it by – and when the way was clear in the opposing lane, I could have gone around him. But now everyone’s stuck waiting while this addled – and entitled – old coot waits for his coot consort (wife) to s-l-o-w-l-y open the door… p-a-u-s-e to gather her breath… then l-e-i-s-u-r-e-l-y take her sweet ol’ time getting out of the car, saying goodbye to the old coot driving the Buick, then absent-mindedly meander to the entrance. Only then does the old Coot deign to move his Buick.

        Clover abides…..

    • Eric_G
      June 17, 2014 at 8:02 pm

      “Old men… Put a hat on them and you might as well call it a day…”

      The teacher of my driver’s ed class called them “Mad hatters.” We all laughed until we got behind one.

    • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
      June 17, 2014 at 9:14 pm

      “Old men. Slow, always unsure of where they’re going, turn left with a right directional, etc. Put a hat on them and you might as well call it a day because it just got worse.”

      Ahh yes. The old dude with his hat in a huge floatmobile. That’s ubiquitous globally it seems, even in Oz.

      “Young black men. Hate, hate, HATE being passed and will do everything possible to prevent you, including after you pass them, they pass you on a double-yellow and slow back down.”

      We don’t have any afro’s here but that normally happens with BMW or “upper crust” drivers. They’ve done it to me a few times while I was on the bike and they suddenly lost a taillight to my foot.

  10. ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
    June 17, 2014 at 7:56 am

    I remember years (well.. decades now) ago in our rural community when slow pokes used to drop a wheel off the road and let us all pass. I wonder what happened in society that was so profound to generate 10x the amount of clovers we had back then. Was it the excess of the 80’s (my teenage formative years) or the 90’s? Not just more slowpokes and clovers, but the type that Eric describes – those infuriatingly idiotic and selfish arseholes that refuse to acknowledge the rest of humanity (if any).

    A window washer bottle and pump filled with brake fluid and attached to the rear would be useful. Even one on the front and each side if you find yourself surrounded.

    A bikie mate of mine years back had spray packs of bright orange paint strapped to the sides of his rat bike. He’d spray the appropriate side of a clover’s car as he split the traffic and made his way to the lights. Kinda reminds me of the mods I always wanted to make.. ;)

    • eric
      June 17, 2014 at 8:21 am

      Yeah, I don’t get it, either.

      Usually, I drive faster than traffic, but when I’m slow-poking along (as, for instance, in this case) I’ll move over, even pull off the road briefly/wave the traffic behind me to pass. No skin off my nose. And a lot less stressful than having a conga line hanging off my bumper!

    • Me2
      June 17, 2014 at 9:12 am

      cup full of 3/4″- gravel. Loose T-case gator.

      Ting, ting, ting, crack. Clover needs a headlight and windshield.

      Not my invention but my buddy cracked me up when he told me. I did point out that this was an asshole thing to do but I could understand why he did it.

      • eric
        June 17, 2014 at 12:40 pm

        I got to thinking afterward:

        The truck’s bed was full of 60 pound bags of cee-ment and cinder blocks. If the tailgate had swung open….

        • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
          June 17, 2014 at 9:02 pm

          Ahh.. if only :)

          Need a manual release..

    • chiph
      June 17, 2014 at 10:14 am

      >> when slow pokes used to drop a wheel off the road and let us all pass

      They do that in west Texas. They’ll start driving in the break-down lane (not really reducing speed much). Which is nice of them, but the first time I saw it I wasn’t sure what they were doing.

      Doing the unexpected is also bad behavior. Know your right-of-way laws, be courteous. That’s all I ask.

      • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
        June 17, 2014 at 9:05 pm

        The truckies usually give each other a quick flash of the indicator when it’s safe to pass.. sometimes they do it for others as well. Afterwards it’s courteous to flash left and right indicators quick to signal a thanks.

    • BrentP
      June 17, 2014 at 12:58 pm

      What happened?

      Nixon’s 55mph National Mandatory Speed Limit. That’s what did it. That’s the root cause. Much more sprung from it, but the self righteous my speed is the best speed, you have to obey government’s absurdities that has brought about the profound decay starts there and the lies to keep the NMSL alive for the next 20 years.

      Yes it’s been gone for nearly two decades now, but the damage lives on and some places are still in that era.

      Cloverism however goes back into the 1930s, but back then it was often despised given the films I’ve watched. Nixon and the NMSL let cloverism bloom. Claybrookians reinforced it and we’ve lived with it ever since.

      • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
        June 17, 2014 at 9:07 pm

        I think it’s more the proliferation of speed detection crap rather than the NMSL, which we don’t have in Australia. Even a parked car with a bonnet up causes these clovers to crap themselves and hit the brakes in case it’s a mobile cam.

        • BrentP
          June 17, 2014 at 9:24 pm

          In the USA that’s when lane discipline and proper courtesy went away never to be seen again. Because of it “speed kills” got it first real foothold based on the bogus data. From there it spread across the world as governments world wide grasped the revenue scam it was and implemented their own versions. Sure there was some before then, but it was the 55mph NMSL that really f’d things up.

          • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
            June 17, 2014 at 9:31 pm

            The NMSL was likely the USSA’s start to clover’s driving habits, but over here we didn’t have that. I believe you’re right about the “speed kills” mantra. Everything besides “speeding” is now OK despite how frustrating and dangerous it is.

      • swamprat
        June 19, 2014 at 9:00 pm

        I think clover type driving habits existed before the 55 mph speed limit, but that law did more to exacerbate the situation an any single piece of legislation or act since that fateful day in 1973 when Nixon suggested lowering speed limits and when the law was finally passed on Jan 2, 1974.

        None has stated it better than Brent, so I’m gonna let it go.

        Observations about the era:

        In 1974-77, there was a large slowdown, but there were still a large number of people who drove more than 70-75 on the highway.

        In 1977-81, federal grants for enforcement were greatly increases as were compliance requirements. Lane discipline decreased dramatically and cloverism really blossomed.

        In 1982-1986 The alleged non compliance with the speed limit got more media attention.

        In 1987-1995 People were largely happy with the 65 mph speed limit on interstates, but the NMA wasn’t. The fatality rates on interstates increased in 1987-1988 then began dropping again as people got used to the speed. By 95, they were close to the 1985 levels. They sent a citizen-lobbyist (Gail Morrison) to Washington DC to fix the problem.

        In 1996-to present, things are a lot better. Public opinion has changed and people like driving faster again. I see trouble on the horizon due to a stunning veto in Florida of a 75 mph speed limit.

        Cloverism is not dead, but people are driving faster and comfortable with higher speed driving.

        Let’s hope it continues.

        1996-2005

        • BrentP
          June 19, 2014 at 10:00 pm

          I know cloverism goes back at least to the 1930s. But it was treated the way we treat it. Until the NMSL. That’s when it took over.

          A fine anti-clover film I’ve mentioned before: https://archive.org/details/wreckless

          • eric
            June 20, 2014 at 6:23 am

            I agree, Brent.

            People over 40 today can recall the ridicule for the “safety culture” that was common – typical – as recently as the 1970s. It began to tip during the ’80s, as the “mom culture” became dominant.

            No one will ever land on the Moon again.

    • Eric_G
      June 17, 2014 at 7:58 pm

      Can’t find the law now, but in Colorado slow traffic is supposed to pull off and let others around. It’s mainly aimed at 5th wheel campers with underpowered tow vehicles (and Texas plates, but I’m being redundant) on mountain passes.

      I seriously doubt any cop has ticketed anyone failing to pull off and let others pass though.

      • ЯΞ√ΩLUT↑☼N
        June 17, 2014 at 9:09 pm

        Exactly. It’s a rare thing for a cop to ticket anyone going too slow. A law never enforced is a law null and void as they say..

    • Garysco
      June 18, 2014 at 12:18 am

      Hey Rev- USA – We are #1, you guys have nothing on us. And you though Mad Max was tough. Ha. We have urban female drivers tougher then him.

      LOS ANGELES (AP) — A substance-abuse counselor was sentenced Thursday to 55 years to life in prison for hitting a pedestrian with her car and driving through a Los Angeles suburb with the dying man on her windshield.
      http://www.wtop.com/209/3640733/Woman-who-drove-with-dying-man-on-car-gets-prison

  11. Garysco
    June 17, 2014 at 7:54 am

    Wanna bet she went straight home and after the doctor prescribed Dow Chemical zombie buzz wore off pounded the keyboard on her paper mache flowers blog about the rude person in a truck that couldn’t drive properly.

    • eric
      June 17, 2014 at 8:11 am

      No doubt!

      I kinda wish I’d been in the Porsche… something like that. Could have had some real fun with her… .

      • DR
        June 18, 2014 at 7:50 am

        You KEPT the Porsche!?!!??

        j e a l o u s . . .

        • eric
          June 18, 2014 at 9:20 am

          Unfortunately, no!

          But they tell me a GT3 is coming….

  12. swamprat
    June 17, 2014 at 7:37 am

    “you can get as close as you want, but I’m not going any faster”

    “No tailgating: the closer you get the slower I go”

    “If you’re close enough to read this (insert idiotic phrase)..”

    “I brake suddenly for tailgaters.”

  13. swamprat
    June 17, 2014 at 7:32 am

    Yeah, and the little stupid stickers on the back can identify clovers.

    In the 1980’s it was Yosemite Sam donning a double barreled gun: BACK OFF!

    Or: “I may be slow, but I’m ahead of you.

    If I can think of more, I’ll post.

    • eric
      June 17, 2014 at 7:52 am

      Hi Swamp!

      These days, dead giveaways include: “fambly” stick figures, magnetic “ribbons” – and (ironically enough) any NASCAR related sticker.

      • Eric_G
        June 17, 2014 at 7:48 pm

        Jesus (holier than thou) or Darwin (cleverer than thou) fish.

    • BrentP
      June 17, 2014 at 12:50 pm

      D and R political stickers. Doesn’t matter if it’s Obama or Bush or anything else. Nearly a sure sign of cloverism. Mainstream politics on the car equals clover. Side note, Ron Paul on the car is 90/10 not a clover. Only exception to the rule.

      Some local dealerships are indicators on the 50/50 60/40 70/30 levels of how that person will drive. Clover, aggressive, aggressive clover. If others would pay attention in their areas maybe we can see if this has any wider merit.

      “Prosperity is my birthright” license plate frame or sticker = clover.

      Perhaps one day I should sit down and write out all the tell-tale signs I use to get through traffic.

      • Eric_G
        June 17, 2014 at 7:50 pm

        That’s funny. The Ron Paul for president bumper sticker was the first (and only) sticker ever put on my car. Unfortunately it will likely be the last one too.

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