There’s a reason why new cars – even the large ones (which aren’t very large compared with the American cars that once roamed the roads in vast herds, now gone) only seat five and not very comfohtabry (say it Japanese-style, like the old Datsun commercials):
They don’t have seats for more.
At one time, they did. And many cars (especially American cars) seated six – or more – without a third row of seats. Because they had bench seats.
Some will remember. . . . 
These were seats that sat three-across in both rows and pretty comfortably, too – because it was often just one continuous seat, maybe with a fold down upper section in the middle for an armrest when no one was sitting there. Some will remember sliding across the bench seat, either to get out the other side or to make space for someone getting in. If you were a kid riding in the back you could stretch out and go to sleep lengthwise on a long trip. This was, of course, in the days before the Safety Cult became a mainstream religion and kids could stretch out for a nap in back – because their parents weren’t expected to strap them in to “safety” seats like Hannibal Lector, Jr.
The point here is that bench seats allowed a car – or a truck – to carry more passengers, which made them more practical. 
In the case of trucks, you didn’t need to buy an extended or crew cab (and get stuck with a shorter bed, which made the truck less practical) to be able to carry three people – two plus the driver – in the front seat of a regular cab pick-up. Then some clever person figured out that money could be made selling truck buyers extended and crew cab trucks by installing bucket seats – of all things – in trucks.
Which now only had room for a driver and one passenger up front.
Bucket seats used to be found almost exclusively in sporty cars.
They were there to snug you in so that you didn’t slide around when you drove fast in the curves. It made sense to have bucket seats in sporty cars. But then, it became a thing to make – or rather, to market – every car (and truck) as “sporty.”
Minivans, too.
And the bench seat went by-bye.
Along with the . . . sporty manual transmission that’s very hard to find in any new vehicle, including a number of very sporty cars (e.g., the current Corvette and BMW Z4) and that cannot be found in all but one new truck, ironically enough.
If you need to carry more than four people realistically, you pretty much have to buy a crossover or an SUV with a third row or a full-size, extended or crew cab truck that still has a three-across bench seat in the back. The latter being the last redoubt of a feature that was once as commonplace in new cars as ashtrays that’s now as hard to find in a new vehicle as a cigarette lighter.
In part because of marketing – and in part because of you-know-who. Or rather, you-know-them. The busybodies with legal power to force their preferences on you and make you pay for them; i.e., the “government.”
We’ve been habituated to using this word, which has a bland, almost-innocuous mouth feel, as if it were like a large rock in the back yard you had to mow around. This is not for nothing, as it would be more difficult for the busybodies with the legal power to force their preferences on you and make you pay for them to get you to accept this as you do the rock in the yard you have to mow around.
But how did the “government” kill-off the bench seat – particularly up front?
It did so in the way the “government” often does such things: Oilily and indirectly. Bench seats up front were not illegalized, per se. They were simply made untenable for the car companies to continue offering. This was achieved – circuitously – via the “government” making it illegal to offer for sale a new car without a “supplemental restraint” system – i.e., air bags – in addition to the seat belts that the “government” – i.e., the busybodies – had previously imposed on people by requiring all new cars to be equipped with them.
You will note that in all modern air-bag-equipped “government” compliant modern cars, there are only two air bags up front. One for the driver and one for the front seat passenger. There is no “supplemental restraint” for the person in between – and that is why there is no space for a person in between. Instead, there is a center console in-between.
This is great if you want that. But it’s a shame you can’t have what you’d like, if you’d rather have room for three-across up front.
. . .
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When I was living in SC back in the 90’s, we didn’t have “crew cab” pickups, at least not in our family. If it was more than 3 of us, my brother and I would just ride in the bed. Of course, anyone doing that now might end up getting “lead poisoning”.
It’s a shame that even a young person like myself (34) can remember when bodily autonomy was still “legal”.
It was WHY “standard shift” wad “Three on the Tree”.
It’s also odd that large cars, like the BMW X5 for example, are also losing their middle seat in the back, turning into 4-seaters despite their huge size. Do an image search for “BMW X5 back seat”, for example.
In 1979, being the oldest of six children, I could drive all of us to school or wherever in a green 1970 Toyota Corona. It had a bench front seat. Three in the front and three in the back. It was a bit tight, but doable.
‘Government preferences’. Speaking of, are we entering the Malaise 2.0 era with cars?
All of the silly engineering to meet the EPA fatwas was the main issue with Malaise 1.0. It took the car companies 20 years to get back to respectable levels of reliability after that.
Most of it for naught anyway. I fix Hondas for a living and despite a new CRV having twice as many transmission gears, direct injection, idle stop, tiny turbo engine, low weight oils, etc they still get roughly the same fuel economy as the old ones.
What they definitely are is more complex and expensive to fix. Not quite to the level of planned obsolescence, but it’s getting close. Are you really going to spend $5000 to replace a turbo on a ten year old car when the rest of the car is half worn out already?
Amen, Jake –
Hondas (and Toyotas) used to be simple, easy to fix cars that lasted a really long time; 15-20 years being common because they rarely needed anything major before then and when they eventually did, it was often worth fixing because the cost was not obscene relative to the value of the car itself.
Things like tiny turbo engines, DI and CVTs have not appreciably improved fuel economy; as you note, today’s Hondas are no more (and often less) fuel efficient than the Hondas of 40 years ago. It’s not just Honda, either. It’s all of them.
Mu gf has an older RAV4 with a manual transmission. You used to be able to get it with a V6. The new one is CVT only and four cylinder (DI) only. How far we haven’t come, eh?
Thankfully the Rav still comes with a normal 8 speed transmission, not CVT unless you get the hybrid.
For airbags to have a benefit the occupant has to be positioned exactly right. As Eric points out, in the middle seat ain’t gonna cut it, because that’s where the touchscreens and other distractions go. Can’t airbag that area. But in the places where there are airbags if they go off they have to inflate before your body runs into them. They don’t work if they’re not inflated, and if they smack you when they deploy they’ll cause more problems by pushing you in the opposite direction, which could break facial bones and damage spines. So they put you in an adult child safety seat to protect you from the protection! Then the marketeers sell it as “sporty” as if you’re going to need seat bolstering to make that turn into the Walmart parking lot.
Could I have some recommendations/suggestions for a modern daily-driver capable land barge with a bench? All practical considerations, reliability, parts availability, serviceability and repair-ability of course are desired, but long-distance road trip comfort is at the top of my want list.
Things I’ve considered: Lesabre, Park Avenue, Century, Lucerne, Crown Vic/Grand Marquis/Town Car, Avalon first two gens (very hard to find with a bench). Minivans are also pretty comfortable, I like the Sienna and Town and Country, even though it’s not a bench, having empty space there is nice.
I owned 4 LeSabres, comes with best engine GM ever made. the 3800. I know this for a fact as I live near Flint and one day when I was fueling my 2003 LeSabre. The guy at the next said “hey I built that motor it is the best GM motor ever”. I got over 370,000.00 miles on it before I sold it. For all I know it may be going still. I also owned a Century 2003, same engine, gave it to my daughter she drove it forever. then when she moved to VA for school she had to get “tested” of course some “sensors” had gone caput, it then had 275,000.00 miles she sold it for a grand to a W VA person. i also owned a Crown Vic and a Grand Marquis. Basically the same car. The CV was a 1987 put 250K on it. Still running well when I sold it. The Grand Marquis was a 2004, same story except it had the key pad for unlocking. all cars should have that. Great if you lock the keys in the car, also as I am a runner, I park and run for an hour or 2. The key pad beats leaving the key under the tire or in the gas cap. In case you have any question I put a lot of miles on a car. Never had a lease, but am religious about oil changes and any other maintenance. If repairs are needed I do them or get them done.
Hey Ugg, thanks for the info. Everyone says the 3800 is great. I worry that that’s just something people say because everyone else says it, and not necessarily because it actually is. All of the Series 2s had head gasket issues. Is this a repair that, once completed, will never happen again if the vehicle is taken care of, or is this a pattern failure that the engine will always have? Did any of the 3800s or 4.6s burn oil? I’m not a fan of that either. But ultimately I just have to sit in each one and decide from that.
Hi Brandon,
The 3.8 (Buick) V6 has many virtues. For one, it is simple. Pushrod/overhead valves. For another, it was originally designed as a carbureted engine so it is likely any could easily be retrofitted to that (or a simple TBI set-up). Lots of them were made, so parts are abundant. Easy to work on. Even if you do have to replace the head gaskets, this jobs is not a PITAS on an engine such as this one.
Eric,
As a kid we always wanted the middle of the front seat so that we could do the shifting.
Anon
I honestly don’t miss the bench seat. That’s just me. But I miss it to the point that it’s gone. If it’s demise is due to a crowding out effect of regulatins, it’s too bad it’s gone
As for the highway delight, I was able to get that from an ex in a 96 Mustang. I prefer knocking it around in a hotel room though. I like the full view.
There’s your reason for our outrageous divorce rate. Most think it’s feminism, but nay, the bench seat kept feminism in check. Prove me wrong.
Senator McClownell will address your challenge:
https://twitter.com/HannahPThomas/status/1696936240040321474
Okay, no more questions. You broke the Senator.
Hi Jim,
America is run by senile old men. It fits, eh?
Mitch’s affliction has been diagnosed on the internet as Rigor Tortoise.
https://tinyurl.com/2d8spmpn
He can’t even catch flies in his mouth anymore. 🙁
Wow! It’s been a LOONG time since I was THAT drunk. And I used to drink professionally.
As an old man,,, I concur.
That’s hilarious except it could happen to the best of us. All that said, it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.
In a perfect world, we would all live long enough it happens to us. Hopefully we won’t be pretending to run the government by then though.
It is time for these older guys and gals to retire. I realize they only have several million to live on during retirement, but they are destroying this country. McConnell, Feinstein, Pelosi, Biden, Grassley, and Waters it is time to go. The problem is these bastards are so selfish. They much rather make us a laughingstock for the world to see.
When one has a POA because you can no longer represent yourself, you have no creditability to represent us.
It’s their monstrous ego and excessively exaggerated opinion of themselves that keeps them hanging on. That and being constantly surrounded by a chorus of sycophants telling them how great they are doing. Feinstein is essentially a dead woman NOT walking, and barely speaking.
Not only their massive egos, but can you imagine these fools having to go out and get a real job? Or sit in an interview and have to talk UP to someone who is going to decide if they are good enough for the job? It is too far beneath them, because they are used to being in the one percent.
Bu,,, Bu Trump is 76.
Trump’s problem is not his age, but his determination of warp speeding “safe and effective” shots. That should make him ineligible…Biden, too.
Hi RG,
Absolutely. His being old bothers me far less than his inability to admit he was fooled – and that leads me to believe he was complicit. Either that, or he’s just stupid. None of it is good.
You are correct RG,,,, I was just poking…. You get a cookie!
You CANNOT vote for anyone but Trump. That guy makes the people we hate heads explode. Him getting elected would drive them stark raving nuts!
I was at a party a while ago and told a liberal woman (I don’t like) that Trump is going to be the next President. She had a fit. She started screaming about him and ended up crying. It was great! There is no one else that can do that to my enemies and I love it. They foam at the mouth when they think of him. Just the election process will drive them crazy. If he was to get elected they would flip out. I might actually have a legitimate reason to shoot those bastards. The whole process is a sham and it doesn’t matter what he does in office as it’s all controlled anyway. So why not have a guy that wrecks the other side just by existing?
The fossils can’t quit. Not only are they sick in the head and can’t give up the power they scared to death that without the political power of office they’ll be prosecuted for what they’ve done.
Hi Brent,
If they can remember what they had for dinner the night before they can remain. I can guarantee Mitch, Joe, and Dianne wouldn’t pass the test.
RG,
Is it that they can’t remember, or are they preparing a senility defense for their upcoming trials?
That would actually be a very cunning idea, but eyes don’t lie. Theirs show that they are in a land far, far, away.
If you’re not fit to stand trial, then you don’t even go to trial
The system is set up to encourage their neverending tenure. The longer you spend in DC the more plum committee choices you get. And we all know that’s where the pork gets divvied up. There’s a fairly significant portion of the voting public that depends on keeping the cash flowing into the districts and states these fossils “represent.” Once they go, the chairmanships go back in play.
In the case of Ol’ Mitch, if he drops dead now, he’ll be replaced by someone appointed by Andy Beshear, the Democrat governor of Kentucky until a new (s)election can be held. Either Mitch or someone in the Republican party is doing whatever it takes to keep him cognizant enough to show up to work.
It really shows just how shallow the whole thing has become. There should be hundreds of highly qualified candidates across all jurisdictions constantly trying to unseat the incumbents, both from other parties and inside the party of the current senator. Mitch has gone to rot, should have been challenged 20 years ago and let the pork go. But no, everyone’s so dependent on DC and done so poorly at running their affairs without getting their rents that without it they instantly die.
It is up to We, The People to control DC and the rent seekers not the other way around.
“It is time for these older guys and gals to retire.”
Careful what you wish for. We’ll see how well you like President Gavin Newsom. He’s at least as vile and evil as those “older guys.” And he’ll have more energy and charisma.
ps. I hate to see age prejudice deployed here. Just another way to divide people.
“ps. I hate to see age prejudice deployed here. Just another way to divide people.”
Smart ass….;)
I have no problem with age. If you are capable, you are capable. But, when Joe doesn’t know the difference between his sister and his wife, Mitch stares blindly off into space, and Dianne can’t answer “yes, no, or present” it is time to purchase that new home in Sedona, Arizona, or The Villages in Florida and call it a day.
I’d go with Sedona. It’s a bit milder than Phoenix due to its altitude and gorgeous.
I wouldn’t wish The Villages on my worst enemy.
That place is nasty.
Ron Paul is still at the top of his game at 88.
If McConnel goes right now, his most likely succcessor will be Rick Scott (RINO-FL), poster child for the term “un-indicted co-conspirator” and another pol whose antics you will want to be aware of before making a commitment to moving to Florida.
Again!!
Not only broken, but irreparable.
The SOB (Slide Over, Baby) seat
Slightly off topic:
The Floridian “authorities” are warning to keep your EVs and hybrids away from salt water, lest they incinerate everything around them.
https://tinyurl.com/ydrhk8nn
Here’s a better plan. If you live in such area, DON’T BUY ONE!!
Thank God someone ordered my 71 442 with a bench. That has enabled me to receive the “highway delight” from a few chicks over the years! My 79 F150 has a bench as well. My 2009 grand Marquis has two massive seats that act as a bench. The “higway delight” is capable in all three!
The photo of the kids in the back of the station wagon reminded me of the ultimate privileged kid riding accommodation from ‘way back when I was just a little engineer. My parents had, for a while, a ’66 Buick Wildcat convertible. The space into which the top folded itself in the top-down mode was empty when the top was up. There were four of us kids. Ordinarily, three were across the back seat, and one had to ride up front between mom and dad, who smoked incessantly and wouldn’t let you get away with anything — bummer. However, on a long trip, whoever called “dibs” first would get to lie down in that vacant convertible-top space. That was luxury. It was easy to sleep that way. Just a little slice of Kid Heaven.
I’m hanging on to my 91 Silverado std cab bench seat truck for dear life. It’s the last adult size seat available in our “fleet”. Buckets in the 03 Escape, Meh – short seat bottom no thigh support. The 2018 Grand Cherokee worse yet, short and narrow both and near zero padding after 40 minutes you’re ready to walk instead. The subtle shaping of the Silverado seat is really comfortable, the corrugated cloth still looks new and no “swamp ass” like the unperforated leather in the Jeep.
My buddy in high school, the preachers kid, made great use of dad’s ‘70s New Yorker. Back seat the size of a sofa plus drive in movie = numerous gals biblical experience so to speak.
I recall frequently seating 4 across in pickup trucks back in the day.
Hi Robbie,
A 1978 Chevy Silverado bench seat can sit mom, dad, and four little kids between the ages of 3-8. Can’t say it was comfortable, but I remember many trips from Maryland to Virginia. Fortunately, this was the old days where the only seat belt one needed was Mom’s arm when Dad hit the brakes too quick. 🙂
All the talk about bench seats leading to snuggling & more with the GF made me think of “Paradise by the Dashboard Lights” by Meatloaf.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C11MzbEcHlw
‘There is no “supplemental restraint” for the person in between’ — eric
Nope. That real estate is needed for the Colorful Clownscreen of your four-wheeled cell phone.
*pulls out a ball peen hammer and begins shouting anti-gov slogans, to the sound of breaking glass*
‘Keep your hands off that screen, boy!!!’
https://ibb.co/ypF6r8v
With a bench seat, your girlfriend could snuggle up next to you, which was a status symbol back in the day when cruising Main St. Or…if it were (3) dudes in the front bench of an F150, the guy riding shotgun next to the window would duck down when we saw some girls. Then it made the guy in the middle the snuggle feature to the dude driving. Of course, today that would not only be considered not uncommon but encouraged.
Oh, the fun we can’t have anymore.
I had a ’72 Nova, bench seat and 3 on the floor. I got so good driving it that I could have my girl next to me with my arm around her and still shift the gears. It was a 3 speed so as long as I was rolling even a little bit I could east it along in 2nd, and reach over with the left arm and bang it into 3rd when I got up to speed. There were a few times I started from a slow roll in 3rd, and a few times I stalled it out. Rode the clutch a lot. Went through a couple too.
I had back problems. They went away when I replaced my truck with bench seats for one with buckets. I needed that center bolster, badly. Obviously I was fine with benches, until the back problems, and made no earlier effort to get buckets. They took out bed space.
At one time probably more Americans lost their virginity in the front (bench) seat of car then anywhere else. Also the reason so many kids today are celibate losers.
So true, krusty, so true.
“…So many kids today are celibate losers”
Yes, Krusty, and though some would probably excoriate me for saying so, I could almost guarantee that’s a large part of what’s behind the high suicide rates in teenage males, as well as some of these mass shootings.
It’s increasingly difficult for a young man to strike up a conversation with a girl, let along bang her in his car (which he probably doesn’t have anyway, these days).
I just read somewhere this generation of teens is having the least amount of sex then any previous generation. Can you believe it? The generation with a complete encyclopedia of sex at their fingertips, a culture drenched in sexuality, and knowledgeable of every perversion known to man. Is not getting laid. Sad.
Maybe their parents can arrange a “play date” for them!
It’s very possible to lose one’s virginity in a car with bucket seats.
Inconvenient, but possible.
I know the last new car for sale in the U.S. with an available front bench seat was the 2014 Impala, but aren’t there still some full size pickups and SUVs still available now with such? Especially the standard cab trucks?
I definitely liked the bench seats in the last two cars I owned that had them: 1978 Ford Fairmont station wagon, and 1989 Mercury Grand Marquis
> aren’t there still some full size pickups and SUVs still available now with such? Especially the standard cab trucks?
Even the U-Haul I rented recently (10′ on a 1-ton GMC cutaway van chassis) had buckets. The bigger ones might still have bench seats, but at least the smallest ones don’t.
I remember bench seats pretty well. My dad’s old Ford LTD had ’em. Our good friends had one of those old school woody wagons with the fold-down tailgate. We’d pile many of us kids in that thing — 6 in the back or even more on occasion was not uncommon.
I remember sitting in a Buick in a showroom when I was in my college years, dreaming of how I could ever afford it. I never did. It had bench seats but I forget which model.
Few people seem to remember these things. So few people realize what’s been taken away.
Three reasons I chose bench seats:
1) Carpools – gave room for an extra passenger
2) Dating – closeness
3) Ersatz bed
I ordered my ’69 SS396 Chevelle with a bench seat –
at one time there was a choice
Eric: “ The busybodies with legal power to force…”
There is no “legal power”, it’s illegal, illegitimate and,
yes – unconstitutional. There are 27 Amendments
to the Constitution, none deal with vehicle
transportation or manufacture.
Favorite: Amendment X:
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution,
nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states
respectively, or to the people.
Hi Liberty,
You’re right as a moral (and even technically true) matter – in re the illegitimate power arrogated by the government. But it is “the law,” nonetheless – much as it sucks.
” But it is “the law,” nonetheless – much as it sucks.” – Eric
Yes,,, that would be how many believe. Notice Congress critters are no longer considered representatives…. now they are law ‘makers’ with no limitations apparently. They write a law,,, some moron signs it and voila…. Law!
Oh we talk much about our form of government and especially its constitution but we don’t come any where near to walking the walk.
Most of what the politicians pass is called “Color of Law”. Probably 90% of ‘laws’ passed. This is covered by statute 18 U.S. Code 242 and is why they had the governors and state legislators do the dirty work. They think the states are exempt. They are not.
Section 242 of Title 18 makes it a crime for a person acting under color of any law to willfully deprive a person of a right or privilege protected by the Constitution or laws of the United States.
Civil Rights Division US Department of Justus.
“For the purpose of Section 242, acts under “color of law” include acts not only done by federal, state, or local officials within their lawful authority, but also acts done beyond the bounds of that official’s lawful authority, if the acts are done while the official is purporting to or pretending to act in the performance of his/her official duties.”
This would cover most of what the fbi, atf, epa, especially fda and edu edicts.
Just my 2c
And the penalty includes DEATH!!
Yes, it does and these covid f-ers deserve it.
The more corrupt the state, the more numerous the laws
– Tacitus 55 A.D.
The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said, “The more artificial taboos and restrictions there are in the world, the more the people are impoverished. … The more that laws and regulations are given prominence, the more thieves and robbers there will be.” He complained that there were “laws and regulations more numerous than the hairs of an ox.” What would he have thought of our world?
Its the overbearing monstrosity from the District of Criminals that’s been on a rampage since 1861.
Eric: “But it is “the law,” nonetheless …”
It may be the “law”, but for whom? Since it is not constitutional law,
it applies to Washington D.C., other federal territory, federal military,
and federal employees. It does NOT legitimately apply to the 50 states
or to We The People. If wanted to apply elsewhere, change “the goddamned piece of paper”.
Hi liberty,
It’s “the law” in the sense that it can and will be enforced upon you (and me) if we disregard it. You can argue all you like about the legitimacy of “the law.” That will get you exactly nowhere in a court of law.
Hi eric,
I’m not arguing about the legitimacy of “the law” but where it can legitimately be enforced.
Also: If a “court of law” is not acting within the Constitution or law,
it is a tribunal or star chamber – not a “court of law”.
Two current examples of star chamber proceedings: Trump and Julian Assange.
Hi libertyx,
Yes, all true – but (again), whether a law can legitimately be enforced is beside the point in that it will be enforced, if it is “the law.”
Didn’t even have to be a full size car back then. I once “did the deed” in the front seat of a Chevy Nova. Unfortunately, I left the headlights on while we were “doin’ it”, and the car was dead when it was time to bring her home. She had to walk home home at about 3 o’clock in the morning. Never talked to me again. Ah, the good old days!
Yeah benches were good for the deed but also so your honey could snuggle up next to you while driving. Simple pleasures of better times.
I do have 3-across capability in my F-150 but, it’s really designed to be an armrest/storage/cup holder area. It does have a third set of belts, lap only, and no airbag. It doesn’t function nearly as well as those you’ve imaged above.
BTW, by getting rid of those nice slide-across bench seats it has also eliminated the Armstrong Heater for young couples…
Did you just give away your age? Haven’t heard that in years.
I guess I’m dating myself…but…then again…no one else will…