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Valentine One Radar Detector

grouch
05-19-2008, 09:57 PM
This is what the pilots write about your flight. I've seen this somewhere before but it was sent to me today and I thought I'd post it here. This is NOT original with me. I just got it today. I assume the originator is Quantas Airlines although I don't know who wrote it up like this.


Actual Entries from Qantas Maintenance Logs

"Squawks" are problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews.

From the "squawk sheets":

Problem: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Solution: Almost replaced left inside main tire.


Problem: Number three engine missing.
Solution: Engine found on right wing after brief search.


Problem: Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear.
Solution: Evidence removed.


Problem #1: #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid.
Solution #1: #2 Propeller seepage normal.
Problem #2: #1, #3, and #4 propellers lack normal seepage.


Problem: The autopilot doesn't.
Signed off: IT DOES NOW.


Problem: Something loose in cockpit.
Solution: Something tightened in cockpit.


Problem: DME volume unbelievably loud.
Solution: Volume set to more believable level.


Problem: Dead bugs on windshield.
Solution: Live bugs on order.


Problem: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent.
Solution: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.


Problem: IFF inoperative.
Solution: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.


Problem: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Solution: That's what they're there for.

D_E_Davis
05-20-2008, 12:15 AM
This is what the pilots write about your flight. I've seen this somewhere before but it was sent to me today and I thought I'd post it here. This is NOT original with me. I just got it today. I assume the originator is Quantas Airlines although I don't know who wrote it up like this.

This may be apocryphal - it's been around for many years. It is certain that such writeups did NOT appear on the official maintenance logs. I'll bet it was written by a maintainer who was sick and tired of vague problem descriptions.