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Thread: Parking Lot Clover

  1. #1
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    Parking Lot Clover

    While going to the supermarket on the way home from work, I discovered another species of clover. This particularly irritating clover can be found in parking lots. The clover may be inside a 4 door sedan, a minivan or an SUV, although they come in many shapes and sizes. It is characterised by consistent refusal to move the transmission from park or neutral to reverse and back the hell out of the parking space. You can observe the parking lot clover first loading his or her bags into the car and then getting into the car. The clover may take a while to get in, but not nearly as long as it takes him to put the key into the ignition and start the car. While the car is running, he may stay for another minute. Another corolarry of this is a clover who drives exactly 5 ph through the parking lot, stopping at every misplaced parking lot stop sign.This clover is responsible for many types of parking lot accidents that involve people who can't take it anymore.

  2. #2
    Senior Member grouch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swamprat View Post
    While going to the supermarket on the way home from work, I discovered another species of clover. This particularly irritating clover can be found in parking lots. The clover may be inside a 4 door sedan, a minivan or an SUV, although they come in many shapes and sizes. It is characterised by consistent refusal to move the transmission from park or neutral to reverse and back the hell out of the parking space. You can observe the parking lot clover first loading his or her bags into the car and then getting into the car. The clover may take a while to get in, but not nearly as long as it takes him to put the key into the ignition and start the car. While the car is running, he may stay for another minute. Another corolarry of this is a clover who drives exactly 5 ph through the parking lot, stopping at every misplaced parking lot stop sign.This clover is responsible for many types of parking lot accidents that involve people who can't take it anymore.

    Well now, I have to come to the defense of some of these people. If they are in a parking spot, they are parked. As for 5 mph in a parking lot, that's the law here in Indiana if there is pedestrian traffic.


    The Clovers I have trouble with are the ones who drive across the marked lanes. These are the ones who will T-bone you when you are in a marked lane and then they will say it is your fault. I finally broke down and bought a cell phone with a camera just for that type of person. These people are usually running anywhere from 20 to 40 mph blithely crossing lanes so they can get where they want to go.
    Honk if you love Jesus.

    Text if you want to meet him.

  3. #3
    Vulture of The Western World Eric's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swamprat View Post
    While going to the supermarket on the way home from work, I discovered another species of clover. This particularly irritating clover can be found in parking lots. The clover may be inside a 4 door sedan, a minivan or an SUV, although they come in many shapes and sizes. It is characterised by consistent refusal to move the transmission from park or neutral to reverse and back the hell out of the parking space. You can observe the parking lot clover first loading his or her bags into the car and then getting into the car. The clover may take a while to get in, but not nearly as long as it takes him to put the key into the ignition and start the car. While the car is running, he may stay for another minute. Another corolarry of this is a clover who drives exactly 5 ph through the parking lot, stopping at every misplaced parking lot stop sign.This clover is responsible for many types of parking lot accidents that involve people who can't take it anymore.
    Let's not forget the Clover who just has to back into a parking spot - and needs multiple tries to get it done.

    Or the Clover who parks his/her SmoooooVeee right up against your door, so you can't get into the car without risking a ding to your (or the Clover's) vehicle.

    And, the sure sign of a Clover Breeder: Stork Parking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eric View Post
    Let's not forget the Clover who just has to back into a parking spot - and needs multiple tries to get it done.

    Or the Clover who parks his/her SmoooooVeee right up against your door, so you can't get into the car without risking a ding to your (or the Clover's) vehicle.

    And, the sure sign of a Clover Breeder: Stork Parking.

    Yeeeeeeeeeeeesss. I encountered a backup clover about a couple of weeks ago. Took the parking space close to my apt. I was pissed. The backup clover is the quintessential control freak type in my opinion. Watching this guy back into the space. I jammed my car in reverse and squealed the tires pretty good to get away from clover.


    How do you like the pregnant woman parking seen at some of the big warehouse stores?

    I want to barf.

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    Eric how about this for a read, Clover Tails and the Misfortune Drivers. A series of shorts about grappling with clovers. Everyone can sent a funny or tragic clover tail and whip it up insights of driving in an ever increasing clover run over world.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by swamprat View Post
    ... The clover may take a while to get in, but not nearly as long as it takes him to put the key into the ignition and start the car. While the car is running, he may stay for another minute.
    This IS the typical Minnesota driver.

    The parking lot is full - but there is a car, that the clover just entered. Then it takes 2 - 3 minutes to fasten seat belt, turn car over, decide to exit space in three or four reverses.

    I don't wait for these people, I just move on.

    However.... there is another type of clover that will patiently wait behind for the 2 - 3 minutes - tying up traffic behind them!!!!

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    Saw another parking lot clover today. I hate that crap. Was in the Food Court Parking area at the Seminole Town Center mall. Idiot had his reverse lights on. I pulled up further and found a place. Was out of the car and walking towards the front door before that idiot backed his fructose addled ass out of the space.

    What the fuck is wrong with this country. People have absolutely no concept of time nor consideration of others time. I always try and get the fuck out of people's way as they may be in a hurry. But no, most of these dopes just sloff around, oblivious to everything around them.

    This is a primary reason this country is turning into a wasteland.

    MAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

  8. #8
    Vulture of The Western World Eric's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swamprat View Post
    Saw another parking lot clover today. I hate that crap. Was in the Food Court Parking area at the Seminole Town Center mall. Idiot had his reverse lights on. I pulled up further and found a place. Was out of the car and walking towards the front door before that idiot backed his fructose addled ass out of the space.

    What the fuck is wrong with this country. People have absolutely no concept of time nor consideration of others time. I always try and get the fuck out of people's way as they may be in a hurry. But no, most of these dopes just sloff around, oblivious to everything around them.

    This is a primary reason this country is turning into a wasteland.

    MAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
    I had to pass three Clovers on the double yellow today. Each doing no more than 50 (slowing to 40, randomly, every half mile or so) in a 55 zone where normal/still-operative-brain humans are doing 60-ish.

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