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Thread: Let's be illegal!

  1. #1
    DonTom
    Guest

    Let's be illegal!

    Actual letter to Senator Sarbanes:



    Dear Senator Sarbanes:

    As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

    My primary reason for wishing to change my status from US citizen to illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the US for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one, and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

    Simply put, those of us who have been here lagally have to pay taxes every year, so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding 2years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005. Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

    Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to ther law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the US for my son.

    Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car

    If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative,

    Thank you for your assistance. You loyal constituent, Pete Mc Laughlin

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    4,934

    Re: Let's be illegal!

    Get a life.


  3. #3
    DonTom
    Guest

    Re: Let's be illegal!

    Get a life.

    Why bother?

    "Life is a dead-end street."
    --H. L. Mencken

    "Do we not now wander through an endless nothingness?"
    -Nietzsche

    "Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive."
    --Elbert Hubbard

    "Men fear death, as if unquestionably the greatest evil, and yet no man knows that it may not be the greatest good."
    --William Mitford



    -Don Quoteman

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